Whether you like it or not, at some point in your child’s
life, s/he is going to learn how to use profanity, whether it comes from other
sources, or like Ralphie in “A Christmas Story”, you, the parent, will be
providing a front-seat show every time you have an uncontrolled rant. The
embarrassing thing to me is that while my kids as toddlers may not have
understood the meaning of the words, they were contextually correct when they
were yelling at other drivers in heavy traffic. Fortunately for me, the windows
were closed and I was the only one in the front seat, which made it easy for me
to hold back any impression that I thought it was amusing or spot on in its assessment.
Thankfully, profanity is still not “SOP” in their vocabulary and routine
conversation, and I imagine it’s every parent’s wish that their children don’t
end up working on a loading dock for the military or UPS. The pay was fantastic
for the time, but the education was, well…wow. I never thought anyone could say
something quite like that in a protracted fit of rage. Until then, I didn’t
know that people could go from zero to thermonuclear in the blink of an eye.
While I shouldn’t find it acceptable, I’m grateful that my childrens’ profanity
has slipped out only when a situation seems profoundly ridiculous, and at that,
those times are extremely rare. My father taught his kids that swearing is the
mark of a small and unimaginative mind incapable of adequately describing a
situation, which is also what I have tried to teach my kids, and if they felt
the need to use such language, that they would substitute “cleaner” words such
as “asparagus” or “sugar” or “shiitake”. Considering my experience, I believe my
father was blessed not to hear the “colorful” remarks I’ve heard over the
years.
In a sense, though, it’s kind of important that kids
understand cussing. Better that they don’t actually use it, but I think people
in general should be aware of when anger, confusion, and/or frustration are
directed at them, as the situation could escalate to unnecessary violence.
Cussing can be cathartic, then silly, then leading to a better mood and
outlook, as long as you are the giver and not the receiver. I think most would agree that cussing is best served in the privacy of
one’s own mind. That way, even if your kids do cuss (privately), their image in
the eyes of others will remain intact.